If it has tits or wheels it will give you trouble.
by: Lost MC Goon

Damn, never have more true words been spoken. Now I am the first to admit that I am not the authority when it comes to women. I have a tattoo on my ring finger these days to remind me that after getting married and divorced four times it is time to call it quits.

So now that I know not to walk down the isle ever again I am well acquainted with tits giving you trouble.

These days however I am also getting schooled in wheels giving you trouble. I have been working on my chopper project for a little over a year now, and am reminded daily of my personal limitations and short comings. It all began when I picked up a wrecked bike last year for a song and a dance. The front end was toast, and I just happened to have another front end sitting in my garage. Simple swap and throw a motor in right????? Hell no, my welder took his time in getting around to the project and basically 3 days of welding took about six months. So I finally got the rolling chassis back to me in April and my scheduled completion was May. Not much left to do right???? Well, wrong, got the motor in and then my wiring assistance fell through.. Actually pretty much disappeared I just love it when some tells you they are going to help you out then when the time comes you can't get in touch with them. So I begin the rewiring process. I had planned to make some changes from stock so I spent roughly 3 months going through the wiring. Cutting back the stock wiring and adding to it when necessary. I went cross-eyed staring at the wiring diagrams.

Finally the day came that I was finished. I mocked up the tank, attached the battery, crossed my fingers and pushed the button. NOTHING, not a damn thing happened. No click, no starter turning over, nothing. So in desperation I made a call to another friend asking for help. He is an electrician and rides with my club so no problem.. We will get it over to his house and bam.. Rewire it. So, now another month of phone tag goes by, and nothing. Finally I realize that this project it going to teach me another lesson. Depend on no one other than yourself. If you get in a bind, do what you have to, learn what you don't know, and fix it your damn self. Last night I stripped down the project and cut out about ten pounds of wiring. I am starting from scratch, and pretty much going step by step; first up will be simply the ignition circuit. Once that is finished the luxuries will be added (Headlight, taillight, and such).

In the end I am learning a lesson from both of these situations. If it has tits or wheels it will definitely give you trouble but it will also teach you self reliance, and make you a better person in the end.

Lost MC Goon